This year has been by far the biggest of my life so far. I finally have a job that I love. I feel like I have a purpose and I’m so excited for what 2019 will bring. I feel happier than I have ever been so here are the things that I learnt this year that have led me to be so happy. Full disclosure: there will be cliches (but they are cliches for a reason!)
It’s OK to put yourself first.
In fact it isn’t just OK, it is NECESSARY. This is the most important thing I learnt this year, possibly in my whole life. I love making people happy and I have always been a people-pleaser. I still am, but without realising, I was never expressing how I truly felt… about anything. I was never putting myself first. Even for the small, meaningless things. It sounds selfish but if YOU don’t value yourself, and look after yourself first, you will eventually lose your sense of who you are. I took a massive step and quit my steady-pay job for the unknown world of personal training, but I am so happy and proud of myself! I’m not saying you have to do something so drastic! Start small. Watch the film you want to watch, take an hour for yourself to do something you love, prioritise you.
Not everyone will support you
When you make a big decision to change your life, you will find out who your true friends are. Starting a self-employed business is really hard. It is pretty all-consuming. Don’t get me wrong, I love what I am doing now, but the amount of 12 hour days (in the gym with no sunlight), 4am starts and 10pm finishes I have done is unholy! Not everyone will understand why you are working so hard. Why you can’t make their birthday party, or your cousin’s wedding or why you work on the weekends. You have to make sacrifices to be successful and the people that don’t understand that, are the ones you will likely lose along the way. Better to have a small, strong friendship group that supports you through everything, than hundreds of friends that don’t truly know you.
Positivity attracts positivity
I promised you cliches didn’t I?
This is a phrase that seems to float around for no reason. I never understood it until this year. When I found out that even my working life could be a positive experience. Becoming a personal trainer has given me more confidence than I ever had before. I am so grateful for the people that helped me find the confidence to do it. I have also met some really awesome people because of that change. People who I never would have met otherwise. In fact, if I had met some of these people 18 months ago, I don’t know that we would have even connected, because I was in such a negative place. I now truly believe that the vibe you put out in the world comes straight back to you.
Advice: take it or leave it?
Everyone will want to give you advice. Even if they have never experienced what you are going through. As soon as you do something out of the ordinary, everyone you know becomes an expert on exactly what you are doing. This phenomenon has its pros and cons. Ironically, I’m going give you some advice about advice. Listen to ALL of it. Yes, that’s right – every single bit of advice you are given from anyone. Some of it will be completely useless. Some people’s advice will just outright infuriate you. But some wonderful nuggets come from the most unlikely of people. It’s worth getting knee-deep in all the terrible advice, for the one piece of golden advice you get.
Good things come to those who…
I always wondered why that was the expression. I spent several years waiting for my good things. A job I enjoyed, a purpose, something that made me happy. It turns out this cliche is complete rubbish. Patience doesn’t get you what you want in this case. Good things come to those who put in the work. By that I mean A LOT of work. Stop waiting around. Put your time, your thoughts and your heart into working for those “good things”, whatever they may be for you. No one is going to give it to you. Why should they? You aren’t entitled to anything so go out and work for what you want. You can have it all, but you have to make it happen for yourself.
Love Becky xx